THE MARRIAGE BENFIT reveals how staying together in midlife - when it often seems easier to leave - offers big payoffs in mental and physical health and well-being.
When boomers' marriages come up short on romance and sex, but seems long on disagreements and strife, many boomers choose to leave. But Mark O'Connell believes they should think twice before doing so. THE MARRIAGE BENEFIT is less a book about how to make our relationships better than it is about how our relationships can make us better if we just work on our expectations and improve communications. Harvard professor and psychotherapist O'Connell offers a peek behind the door of a marriage therapist, where readers can see that their problems are not unique, and get good advice on how to solve them.
Through wonderfully revealing anecdotes about couples with problems we all face - long-held bitterness, diminished sexuality, the scars of infidelity and the search for authentic meaning - O'Connell shows how by respecting each other's individuality, looking for 'real' sex, and learning how to play with each other again, we can reap the benefits of the long-term emotional investment we've made.
'Combines wisdom with practical suggestions, humor with insight, experience with fresh idea. O'Connell shows us a way of looking at marriage that instill joy and enthusiams, whle subduing the nagging doubts marriage so often secretly spawns.' - Edward Hallowell, MD, bestselling author of DRIVEN TO DISTRACTION 'Both robustly clinical and intensely personal. Dr. O'Connell's patients speak about their pain and about their dilemmas. Their therapist helps them to see what has ripened between them and what has withered, what can be altered and what can be nurtured. He tells us what staying the course with another has to offer and how it promotes optimal devlopment.' - Jim Herzog, author of FATHER HUNGER